babyurbeautiful

So you've all heard of Elf on The Shelf. No?

OK, so it's this American thing (of course it is).  It started as a storybook with an accompanying elf.  The theory is that Santa needs to work out who's on the nice and naughty lists and so sends an elf to homes where he's not too sure which list the child should be on....the elves then keep an eye on the little darling before reporting back to Santa on Christmas Eve.  However, these elves are very cheeky and each night they get up to all sorts of mischief!

Sounds good, right? We did this when Ella was 4 and she loved it. She was the right age to get the magic of Christmas without asking silly questions or suspecting too much.  

It's a good incentive to encourage them to behave in December as well as getting in the Christmas spirit. The downside, you have to think of something to do with the sodding elf every night before bed! 

Introducing Buddy The Elf

Bum chums

Natural Bum Saviour

Tea has had a major overhaul in the last few years and most supermarkets now have a massive range to choose from!

Our current selection

PG Tips have joined the tea bandwagon and have recently bought out some really nice fruit teas which are caffeine free and don't have added sugar.  Twinings also have a really nice selection.

Most people bring back souvenirs or perfume and booze back from holiday.  Not me, I bought back two boxes of Tetley Cinammon and Pear teabags from Portugal the other week.  They are sooooo nice, but nowhere sells them in the UK.  They are Christmas in a cup!

Clipper do a nice range of green teas, I especially like their mint green tea.  Green tea contains caffeine and I have read mixed things about green tea in pregnancy so have been generally avoiding it.  I'll be sure to get back on it next year in my mission to get back in shape!
Peppermint tea is also naturally caffeine tea and I find it helps with bloating and heartburn and all supermarkets tend to do their own brand of it, so cheap too.

Soft Drinks

Bottle Green do a nice range of cordials.  They are pretty high in sugar so I only have these as an occasional treat.... realise I sound like an anti-caffeine, anti-sugar crazy woman.  They're nice with lemonade or sparking water.  All good supermarkets stock their range.  Waitrose seems to have a particularly good range.

Lime and soda has become my new pub drink.  It has to have tonnes of ice and not too much lime!

Apple juice has been my morning sickness saviour, it must be the sugar, but I've always found it helps in the morning.  Innocent and Copella do lovely cloudy apple juice and these are often on offer in the supermarket.

Grown Up Drinks

Sometimes you really crave a bit of a more grown up drink, especially over a meal.  Shloer is pretty nice, and even better, you can pretend you're drinking wine...ok ok I know it's fizzy grape juice but drinking it out of a wine glass somehow makes a change.  I tried some no alcohol white wine a few weeks back, my verdict, it's sh*t!

One of my favourite things about Christmas is mulled wine, and I was determined to find a booze free one.  I scoured Tesco the other day with no success, but Mr J went to Ikea and came up trumps.  At £1.85 a bottle it's got to worth a try.  I'm resisting opening until 1st December, the same as the panettone that has been looking at me for weeks!  I'll be sure to have a mug of this when we put the tree up in a few weeks time.

Ikea's version of non alcoholic mulled wine

FJ



My little 2lb 1oz superhero at one day old

Having a premature baby is so incredibly hard.  Firstly, it's not planned, for many women, it just happens without any warning or any reason.  For me, I just went into labour at 25 weeks and it's not known why.  I was fortunate that I was in very good hands at Birmingham Women's Hospital and they managed to delay the birth for 3 days to give Oliver the best chance.  For many women, this may not be possible, or even worse, babies born before 24 weeks are not seen as "viable" and many hospitals will not resuscitate.

When you have a premature baby everyone will know somebody that has had a premature baby that is now fine.  We have all seen premature birth storylines in our soaps, and all those babies end up absolutely fine with no health complications.  For many babies, this is true, but not all premature babies are so lucky. 
I remember when Oliver was born we were given a book at the hospital which listed all the conditions that prem babies can suffer from.  I skimmed past NEC (necrotising enterocolitis) as it sounded far too nasty, and at 7 weeks Oliver developed it and that changed his entire life path.
It was at this point I decided to start blogging about our little man, and his long, long journey. 

An article in a local paper about my premature baby blog

Many people simply do not understand the impact of having a premature baby, they simply think they have been born a bit early but will be ok.  That often couldn't be further from the truth.  It's not just the implications of having a sick baby, it's the logistics of being with them, sadly many hospitals cannot care for premature babies and for us we were always an hour's drive away from home, yet still needed to maintain normality for our then 5 year old.  There's the financial impact- maternity leave starts as soon as you have your baby so the maternity pay clock starts ticking and you're therefore expected to return to work sooner which often isn't possible.  Partners often need to take unpaid time off work, and then there's the costs associated with being away from home and travelling to hospital.  Parking alone used to cost us at least £5 a day, depending on the hospital.

One of my first cuddles with Oliver, after 2 weeks of waiting

We are very fortunate to live in a country that has such a great healthcare system, and where treatment is done without question for us and our babies.  Imagine living in a country where treatment was not provided as standard because it wasn't available, you had to pay for it or your health insurance wouldn't cover it.

Please support World Prematurity Day by visiting Bliss and donating to their appeal.


You can also find out much more on Facebook.  Why not change your profile picture to show your support for World Prematurity Day.


Below is a video of Oliver's first year.  Visit my blog oliverjonesmummy.wordpress.com to read more about our little fighter.

FJ

Most of you reading this blog probably either have lovely bumps or cute little babies and toddlers, aka those who can't yet answer back... you just wait a few years.

As a mum of a 7 year old I am both blessed and cursed.  My daughter is an absolute treasure most of the time and undoubtedly the only good thing to come from my first marriage, but my goodness, does she test my patience at times.

Let's take a few basic everyday things for example

Listening

If me and Mr J are in the kitchen and we're discussing where we should go at the weekend, she's in the living room at this point watching some crap attitude filled american kids show on Disney Jr, she'll somehow hear us and will saunter into the kitchen "are we going to the zoo tomorrow?"

Compare that to a typical weekday morning- cue me "Go and brush your teeth and bring a hair bobble backdownstairs".  5 minutes later, she's still nursing a glass of orange juice at the table, I'm reminding her to go and do the above, and of course when she does finally go and do her teeth she forgets the hair bobble.

Imagination

I can put her in the bath and go to put some washing away in another room to go back and she's fully immersed herself in a game of teachers which can last until she's shrivelled up like a prune.  We were on holiday in half term and whilst I sat on the sand in a cardigan she was leaping around in the waves, throwing sand as the waves came in which was something to do with aliens...apparently.

The flip side of this, is the joys of sending her to her fathers every fortnight where she comes back spouting "They don't give me breakfast" amongst others that we know are clearly untrue.  I even challenged it once with the stepmum and ended up looking an idiot!

Learning

Ask her about tropical birds and she can tell you loads.  I look at a bird and think "that's a parrot", she'll know exactly what type of parrot it is and say it to me like I am a complete moron.

Ask her what 2 x 5 is though,  and she'll tell you it's 9.  We've tried workbooks, games, using sweets and explaining maths until we go blue in the face and she's totally switched off.  Sometimes I have to just think "sod it, she's only 7" whilst other times I'm furiously googling to find a maths tutor!

Knowledge

Of course she knows EVERYTHING.  "I know" is her answer to most things.  Clearly not maths though smarty pants.

Diva in the making!

Humour

Being with my Mr J since she was 3, she's adopted his sense of humour and quick wit.  Take for example being in the car a couple of years ago, she spotted a not particularly attractive lady waiting at a bus stop and shouts out "Oi! Pig face"....the window was open and thankfully the traffic lights quickly changed.  You know when you shouldn't laugh, but you can't help it!

At home, it's me she targets.  "You know what she's like she says" to Mr J, shaking her head at me.  "I'm on his team" she says, sticking her tongue out at me.  Charming.

Fashion

7 and self styled!

I'm pretty sure I wore what I was told until I was about 9.  Not this one, you tell her to get dressed on a weekend, and she comes down in an ensemble of her choosing, complete with handbag (sweets and a lip balm are her handbag essentials) and geek chic pretend specs.

We go shopping and I'll point clothes out for her and get turned down.  Choose something for myself "That's rank!" she shouts...whilst trying to tell me a pair of size 5 ladies shoes fit her.


So that's the fun and games of having a 7 year old.  Of course this is all balanced out with her still loving having cuddles and generally being very entertaining. 

It's the teen years I dread.  But then there's always prozac...or gin.


FJ

First of all, it comes in pretty packaging which is always a good start...

Magnitone Barefaced Facial Cleanse & Tone

After an overnight charge, it comes with a handy micro USB lead with a magnetic charger that just sits on top of the Magnitone to charge (OK, I admit I did spend a few minutes looking for a hole for the charging lead to go) I was ready to get to work!  After a quick check of the instructions, which are super user friendly, I jumped in the shower and got to work.  The beauty of this little tool is it can be used in the shower, so no faffing about washing your face separately, and you just use it with your usual facial cleanser. 

Easy to understand guide

There are two settings, you simply press once for daily cleanse and twice for toning.
Then you just let it do its magic!  Just like with an electric toothbrush, you don't need to apply any pressure, you just let it vibrate and gently exfoliate. 

I tend to get blocked pores around my nose and chin so the Magnitone is perfect as it gets deeper into your pores without the need to scrub the life out your face! 

Once you're done, simply rinse, and dry.  The Magnitone comes with a little case which is ideal for nights away.  I then just apply toner and moisturiser as I normally would.  The charge seems to last a while, I've only charged once since I got it and brushes only need changing every few months- so low maintenance. 

"ooh did you really mean to stare at my bottom?"

I've been using the Magnitone for a few days now, and can definitely see an improvement in my skin.  It is definitely brighter and smoother.  I will be continuing to use this simply because it's sooo easy and hassle free to use.  By Christmas I hope my skin will be as shiny a bauble!

This would be a perfect Crimbo present, and perhaps something we'd not necessarily buy for ourselves.  Saying that, there is currently £10 off when you buy online at Boots.

Me and Mr J have just sat and watched Thursday night's Jodie Marsh documentary on Making Babies.  OK, so Jodie's documentaries are hardly Panorama, but they're refreshing and honest.  It was lovely to hear how Jodie Marsh who found fame whilst wearing just a couple of belts has now met the man of her dreams and settled down and wants to be a Mum one day.

In the documentary Jodie herself underwent tests to see what her chances at the age of 35 are of conceiving.  She was shocked at the results that her egg reserves are low.  It was good to see Jodie bare herself in this way, rather than just speak to other couples.

What was interesting was the differences between the UK and America in terms of egg and sperm donation.  We have low supplies of egg and sperm donors in the UK and a lot of this is probably because only expenses in the UK can be paid...£30 for sperm donation and upto £750 for egg donation.  In the US egg donors can expect between $4000-$10,000.  Quite a difference.
Jodie met a group of men all of whom agreed they'd donate their sperm to see if they could become donors.  Out of the 6 who agreed to the trial, only one chap turned up and sadly his levels whilst good enough for regular insemination, weren't good enough to be frozen for donation.

The documentary also featured a guy aka "Ed The Inseminator" who lives in Holland and acts as an sperm donor, but inseminates the mum to be in person, in the usual, ahem,  fashion, as this yields better results.  To date he's made 106 babies!  An interesting concept, I'm not sure many fathers to be could wait in the next room while their other half is being inseminated!

Jodie and Ed The Inseminator

Something that shocked me was the option in America to choose from what is essentially a menu what type of child you'd like.  The guy running the company Jodie visited compared using a surrogate to buying a handbag.  He even had indentical twins himself, which were born 4 years apart due to freezing the eggs.  You can choose height, hair colour, eye colour, intelligence etc. 

I personally think it's fine to use a surrogate if you cannot carry a child yourself due to medical reasons, or say for a gay couple who want a child of their own.  However, Jodie spoke to one doctor who claims to have treated many A list couples, who simply don't want the "hassle" of being pregnant and the impact it would have on their income if they're in the public eye as a model or actree.  He even suggested that some celebs even fake their own pregnancy whilst using a surrogate as apparently to admit to it would be a taboo.  Hmmm, I wonder who has done this?

Is having a baby not about pregnancy too?  If you can't be bothered to carry a baby then can you really be that bothered about having a child?  After all being a parent is for life, pregnancy is just 9 months.  To me pregnancy isn't very glamorous, and yes we put on weight where we don't want it and risk getting the London underground map on our bellies in stretch marks, and lose the ability to bounce on a trampoline without a bit of wee coming out, but that's part of the journey.

This pregnancy has without a doubt been the hardest for me.  I had a suspected miscarriage at 4 weeks, terrible sickness from pretty much as soon as I found out, have since had a cervical stitch and am on twice daily progesterone...yet this is all part of being a Mum to me.  And all this is after losing my little angel earlier this year, which of course causes a lot of emotion.  But to see a beautiful, and hopefully healthy baby at end of this makes it all worth while.

What do you think, would you use a surrogate?  Have you used a sperm donor?

FJ

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John took to Twitter to share this very special photo. I'm sure if that was us, there would be a sick bowl next to the sofa! 

Mandara Spa, London

Whittebury Hall, Towcester in Northamptonshire

Ragdale Hall in Leicestershire

Pumpkin Sheep!

Too much choice....pick your own pumpkin

Biscuit eating...*cough* making

Miniature Train Ride

Off we go - Choo Choo!

Mummy keeping warm with Albs

Amazing Audley End Train